invisible man

Alvin Greene, my favoritest political candidate of the year, is under indictment in his home state of South Carolina, charged with showing a dirty pic to a coed.

One of the two charges Greene faces is a felony. If convicted, he'd be ineligible to hold any political office.

Greene is an unemployed military veteran who lives with his dad. He easily beat a Democratic hack named Vic Rawl in the Democratic primary for the U.S. Senate, despite the fact that he didn't run even the trace of a campaign, had no web site and no campaign organization, and appears to have very few opinions. About anything. He'll face the Republican incumbent Jim DeMint in November, if he lasts till then.

He's a man of few, or sometimes no words. In TV interviews he responds to questions by either staring blankly into the camera or giving one- or two-word responses. He would be absolutely perfect for the U.S. Senate, where the daily shouting into the news cameras, empty rhetoric, phony posturing, and narcissistic preening show the "world's greatest deliberative body" to be a clown riot.

Alvin would add nothing to that. He'd just be there, like a totem pole.

I hope these charges are dismissed, but it looks pretty bad for him. The alleged victim, who has been identified by her first name only, says she was fairly seriously traumatized when Alvin flashed the dirty pic at her on his computer and asked if she wanted to take him up to her dorm room. "It really scared me," she says, "and I still feel intimidated about that to this day."

There's also been some question about how Greene came up with the $10,440 filing fee to get into the primary, but the police say his claim that he saved his military pay for two years is backed up by bank records.

Last month Greene gave his first speech, 6-1/2-minute verbal tsunami in which he said he is in favor of jobs and education. It's good to know he's not against those things.