Thursday, March 08, 2012

homeland security

Bought me a new zippo lighter yesterday. I no longer smoke, but I figure it'll be good for setting fire to the tall grass in vacant lots, to flush out whatever terrorists might be lurking there.

We all need to refine our counterinsurgency skills.


Have you thought about how many terrorists there are among us who have disguised themselves as homeless people pushing shopping carts?

Plus, there's a socialist dictator in the White House, and hordes of females all over the place demanding that I pay for the sex they have with somebody other than me. Times are very rough right now.


The Zippo is a remarkably beautiful and practical artifact of industrialism, an invaluable relic of the age of steel, which was at its peak when I was a lad.

But now technology has gone too far. The Germans have spent over a quarter of a million $US to build a hydrogen-fuel-cell-powered car which is also invisible.

I wonder if the engineers who built this fantastic illusion ever stopped to wonder if an invisible car is the one most likely to be hit. More to the point, did they ever reflect on the fact that there will never be a wholesale adoption of hydrogen to automotive uses?

We don't need minds brilliant enough to design the real James Bond car; we need backs strong enough to stoop down and pull a weed, and wills bent in that direction.

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