Saturday, August 04, 2012

sound minds & lunatics



I. A bunch of people with sound minds, former government officials and academics, are calling on the House Leadership to remove the notorious lunatic and dolt Michele Bachmann from the House's intelligence committee.

A bunch of lunatics who live in Bachmann's congressional district keep returning her to Congress.

II. In an attempt to regulate teh big casino, the sane French government has passed a tax on financial transactions. It might work.

Meanwhile, local loser and well-known lunatic Willard "Mittens" Romney, the Delusional Americans Party presidential candidate, is calling for more tax cuts for rich Americans.

III. "Obamacare," a flawed but sane health care reform, makes 47 million US women eligible for covered prescriptive contraceptive services, to prevent unwanted pregnancies.

A House of Reps lunatic from Pennsylvania, Mike Kelly, responds to this by comparing birth control to Pearl Harbor and 9/11.

IV. In Davis, CA, a nutty campus cop who pepper sprayed protesting but passive students, has been forced out of his job by sane University officials.

The mentally deranged US government has neutralized Possse Comitatus laws by turning local police forces into special forces equipped with full combat gear.

V. Nearly two-thirds of California's citizens pass the sanity test by continuing to favor the state's greenhouse emissions control laws.

Crazy Alabama Sen Jeff Sessions, when told by Californina's normal Sen Barbara Boxer that 98% of climate scientists think his position of global climate change is looney, says he's offended, which illustrates the clinical definition of insanity -- delusional perception and behavior, an inability to comprehend reality.

VI. Kentucky Fried Chicken, one of several fast-food chains which sells deformed and diseased chicken parts deep-fried in dangerously-toxic overused oils, is at least showing some sanity in its position on gay marriage.

Meanwhile, members of a nutbar religious cult who worship a carpenter and maverick rabbi executed by the Romans in Jerusalem two thousand years ago are lining up in droves to eat the deformed and diseased chicken parts deep-fried in dangerously-toxic overused oils sold by Sam Cathy (aka S. Truett Cathy), a pompous, self-important, and terminally-flatulent lunatic who fancies himself a philosopher, and has taken a publicized stand against gay marriage.

It's a mad, mad, mad, mad world.

Adapted from "Sanity and Insanity in American Politics" by Juan Cole, professor of mideast studies at U. Michigan.

Illustration: Detail of a woodcut derived from Pieter Brueghel the elder, "Two Groups of Epileptics Going to the Right," Flemish, 16th century.

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