Saturday, December 08, 2012

news from around here

Here in the exclusive little community where I live now, the residents have been carping and whinging like a busted bagpipe ever since an unwelcome visitor came to town a couple months ago.

A rusty and inoperable tramp merchant vessel with the inappropriate name "New Star" is tied up at the end of the boat dock at the marina. I haven't been able to determine whether this is the same ship sunk near Vladivostock by the Russian navy in 2009 (and pictured here), in very bad weather, causing the deaths of half the crew of 16. The Russians said the Sierra-Leon-flagged vessel was smuggling.

I don't think the New Star is going anywhere any time soon. The owner has apparently sold it for scrap in Mexico, and promised to move it this weekend. However, he is having a hard time finding a tugboat heavy-duty enough to tow it, and a second stopping point, the Port of Astoria, Oregon, is considering his request for moorage but hasn't actually said "Yes" yet.

This wouldn't be the first time the owner failed to deliver on a promise to move the old ship. The residents here are angry because he has committed the absolute worst offense a person can commit in this town. He has ruined the view.

Just a thought, but everyone I'm sure is familiar with the cliché about making lemonade when life gives us lemons (or squirting your enemy in the eye, as an alternative). Why don't we just say it's ours, since it was left on our property? We could turn it into a restaurant or a nightclub or maybe a casino, or a mini-mall where cute little shop-ettes sell sachets and potpourri and stuff like that. Put androids in it and put on a show. It's big and ugly, and so perfect for a turis trapp.

It's ours, so why not do something with it, like decorate it for Christmas, for starters.

No comments: